What Went Down In The Month of August 2023

As a 30-year-old single mom of two beautiful children, August 2023 has been a month of profound learning and self-discovery. I have been juggling the responsibilities of parenthood while rediscovering my own identity.

All that this month has offered has opened my eyes to some invaluable lessons that I am excited to share.

Family drama won’t mentally consume me.

During this month my cell phone seemed like it kept ringing from calls from my auntie who was upset with my mother, uncle, and younger sister. Every other day of the week there was an issue with money, groceries, bills, and comfort.

I couldn’t answer the phone calls any longer. Once she threatened to put my mama in the nursing home I was done answering the phone for her. I understand the frustration but trying to get me all worked up and feisty with you then we have a problem.  All that negative energy trying to take me down mentally and emotionally was not going to disturb the peace of mind that I have now. To the voicemail, you will go!

Don’t Be Afraid of A Better Outcome.

Being the bigger person comes as a second nature for me. This month, I decided to exchange the kids with my ex-husband at the police department. It was the best outcome for me. I do not have to argue with him at all. Just a simple exchange of the kids.

Book our Uber and go. I’m glad I did put the extra money to the side to be able to exchange the kids at the police station this month.

I Don’t Have To Answer to Anybody.

Since living on my own it feels good to be able to come and go as I please. I do not have to tell anyone what time I'm leaving or when I am going to be heading back. I do not have to tell anyone who I am hanging out with, dating, or talking to.

I feel grown. I am a grown woman.

I can get up out my bed and make a meal, eat, or drink whenever I get ready. It feels damn good to finally say that I am maintaining my own for my good.

Redefining Success on My Terms

This August, I learned to redefine success on my terms. It's easy to get caught up in comparing our lives to others, especially in the age of social media, but I've come to understand that my journey is unique and deserves to be celebrated.

I do not care who questions what I do. How do I live? Or how they think I am making ends meet. I am not asking anyone for any handouts. I get up and make things happen for me and my kids. I make sure I value my reason “why”  and keep people out of my business.

Embracing Flexibility and Letting Go of Perfection

As a single mom juggling multiple responsibilities, I often found myself striving for perfection in every area of my life. However, August taught me that embracing flexibility and letting go of the pursuit of perfection can lead to greater peace of mind.

This month, alone I have been back and forth to my son’s school, meeting with his teachers, and the school principal. I have been frustrated and felt so alone with parenting. I decided to let it all go. Put the day down once I finish winding down for bed and give it to God.

Don’t Eat Your Heart Out, Girl.

I’ve been comfortable with eating now that I live on my own. I have packed on a couple of pounds from the birth control I've started. I have now gotten myself back on track with managing what I eat.

As much as I have been wanting to eat my heart out, I think about how I did have high blood pressure and how that played a drastic role in my health a year and a half ago. I want to live a healthy and sustainable life outside of being on medication for my blood pressure so eating my heart out will have to take a side line.

Closing...

As I say goodbye to August 2023, I carry these six profound lessons with me. Each insight has contributed to my growth as a single mom, reminding me that this journey is one of resilience, love, and continuous learning. I am giving myself grace along the way while making a name for myself. I am proud of myself! Let’s see what the month of September will bring our way! Love you lots, Tatar Tot!