Something just had clicked in my brain in early June after an explosive argument with my husband after I closed our bedroom door and sat on the edge of our bed after we diffused the situation.
I knew that I needed help outside of my relationship with Christ. I was in therapy for about a year and a half when I was a teenager. At the age of 17, I was diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety. I was prescribed medications, and I also went to counseling every two weeks to meet with my physiologist and my therapist. Going to therapy as a teenager helped save my life. Even back then, I decided that I needed help, and I sought it willing, especially after praying about it.
This year has been a rocky one and unlike the previous years, this year came with its own lessons, pain, and blessings. A few times in the spring of 2020, I felt so overwhelmed and emotionally drained. Things were happening that took me by surprise in both for the good and the bad. I started to become a person who instead unpacked their personal issues on the people in their lives. I audio and physically journaled heavier than I have in the years before. When I started therapy, I learned five things that I wanted to share with you.
1. You must always give yourself compassion.
When I went into therapy, I was rough on myself. I'm talking about quick to talk down on myself, undermine my own accomplishments no matter how small or big they were, and I always felt like a problem starter. My therapist explained to me the benefits that I can reap by merely giving myself compassion. I have never said anything about being self-compassionate until therapy. When I started being more self-compassionate, the way I talked to myself and thought about myself improved drastically. Being self-compassionate is also a topic that I will be talking about in my next blog post.
2. Overthinking things will never bring you any real satisfaction.
My overthinking made my anxiety worsened. I felt trapped in my world over overthought experiences that never even played out the way I imagine them to happen. Overthinking is also one of the thieves of joy. Let things be what they are or what they may become.
3. I must learn to unpack and my childhood trauma and allow myself to experience whatever feelings it may stir up within me.
I also did not just get into therapy for the sake of my marriage, but also learn how to better cope with my childhood trauma and family issues. Before therapy, I try and not cry or re-feel the sudden rush of emotions that would overfill me whenever I think about how far I have come. I would tell myself to not cry when all along, I needed to cry. I need to expel those emotions freely. I deserved to release my tears, pain, or even words onto paper without withholding anything. I am now allowing myself to remove and pour out any emotions that I may be experiencing.
4. Accept what your family, friends, or anyone in your life don't accept or appreciate about you.
Everyone in your life will not accept you, your dreams, or even what you have to say. I have learned that I must admit that it is okay if others do not accept or appreciate my efforts, kind words, or even truth! I use to be huge on people-pleasing before therapy as well.
Now here is a bonus that I wanted to also add to this post!
5. My love language is affirmations, and I must also love myself with affirmations as well.
My therapist had also recommended that both my husband and I read The Five Love Languages The Secret to Love That Lasts by Gary Chapman.
To better understand one another's love languages. Even our very own this book helped out a lot. I knew that I was big on acts of kindness, but when I found out that my love language was, in fact, affirmations, it helped both my husband and me out immensely. I highly recommend purchasing for you or someone special in your life.
Overall, I am proud of myself that I went back to therapy. I am also proud of the mental and spiritual progress that I have made as well. If you or someone you may know is hesitant about going to therapy, I just want to say that it is what you make it. Approach therapy with an optimistic outlook and never forget your reason why you started. Better mental health may be ahead for you in therapy sessions.
Have you ever went to therapy? If so, what was your experience? If you would like to go to therapy, would you tell anyone or keep it personal?
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